Turning The "I'll Be Happy When..." Mindset into The "I am Happy Because..." Mindset

Turning The "I'll Be Happy When..." Mindset into The "I am Happy Because..." Mindset.

I always feel myself thinking "I will be happy when..." but the goalpost has a habit of changing when that when becomes a reality I find myself looking for the next when to fill its space. It's not to say I am not happy, I am happy, I am just ambitious and it sometimes leads to me lying in bed at night wondering if I will ever reach the goals I have set myself, which in turn provokes an overthinking session which almost always ends in a pity party for one where I lie there feeling sorry for myself because well obviously I'll never amount to anything in life, right? "I'll be happy when I finish uni", "I'll be happy when I get a job", "I'll be happy when I have more money", "I'll be happy when I have lost 5 pounds", it is always something. I will admit, I am an ambitious person, sometimes referred to as a bit of a dreamer, but, I know myself well enough to know I never stop until I get the result I wanted, it is a blessing and a curse because sometimes things just don't move fast enough for me, I get frustrated and take it out on my self-esteem. 

I know people are constantly telling us the "I'll be happy when..." mindset is terrible and will never do us any good, but I just can't help it and I don't think it will ever not be something I tell myself. Like I said, it's not that I am not happy right now, I just always have a goal in mind and sometimes I get so wrapped up in my goals I forget to look around and smell the roses. I have a lot of reasons to be happy, we all do. Every single person who walks this Earth has at least one reason to be happy, we are here, we are alive and we are in control of our own destiny, so why is it so hard for us to see it? We get wrapped up in education, work, arguments, politics, our troubles, the troubles of the world that we don't leave ourselves enough time to take in the good things going on in our lives. The world is so filled with the bad, the disastrous and the damned that we become wrapped up this version of reality where nothing is good and everything is bad and the world is on fire. Richard Curtis puts it into better terms than I ever could during his interview on Channel 4's Ways to Change The World Podcast  (linked here). Richard said "I sort of see the progress of the world a bit like the tortoise and the hare. The hare is all the bad news, attracting all the attention, all the news, making us feel that things are getting worse and worse. But slowly, coming along, is all the scientific, technological, social progress, that it's hard for [reporters] to report."

We are living in a world that is constantly pushing the bad on us, the news is always filled with the bad, the newspapers are constantly overflowing with articles about wars, crime rates, murders and disease that we forget there is goodness in the world. It fills each and every one of us with a sort of dread, anxiety for many, about the world and not only do we see the world through these doom and gloom spectacles but we begin to see our own lives in this way too. We don't see what is making us happy right now, we only see what is making us unhappy and although focusing on fixing that problem is never a bad thing, it should never be what our lives revolve around. Sometimes things just are and sometimes it takes time to move from A to B and we have to just deal with that, but that doesn't mean we can't be happy while we are working towards our goals, we have so many reasons to be happy and here are just a few of mine.

Turning The "I'll Be Happy When..." Mindset into The "I am Happy Because..." Mindset.

  1. I am alive,
  2. I have a family who I love and who love me back,
  3. I have had the opportunity of an education, 
  4. I am young,
  5. I have completed my masters degree, 
  6. I have friends who support me unconditionally, 
  7. I have a warm, safe home that is my safe haven,
  8. I have access to the internet.
  9. I have a blog that I adore and that is followed by real people who enjoy it too,
  10. I live in a country with free healthcare, without war and where I have the same rights as men do, 
  11. I live in a world that includes pasta and pizza,
  12. I can read as many books as I wish,
  13. I am healthy,
  14. I know that the future is a path of my own making, 
  15. The world is beautiful, 
  16. I have a support system that has my back no matter what,
  17. Music exists,
  18. Old movies exist,
  19. Italian movies exist, 
  20. Every day gives me new reasons to laugh and smile,
  21. My parents and I have a close relationship,
  22. I am getting to watch my niece and most of my nephews grow up,
  23. I got to spend time with my nephew before he passed away,
  24. Medical science is advancing rapidly and new cures and medicines are being created regularly, 
  25. I am able to learn from my mistakes,
  26. I have the ability to be and do what I want in life, 
  27. People post pictures of their pets online especially dogs, 
  28. I am able to give back to the world through charity, blood donations, organ donations and much more, 
  29. I know everything will be okay,
  30. There are so many strong, talented and wonderful female role models out there for me to look up to and for the next generation to look up to. 
Is society giving us this mindset of never being happy? Tell me your thoughts below in the comments or send me a message on social media: 

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