5 Reasons to Lose Your Frenemies

5 Reasons to Lose Your Frenemies

You know who I am talking about. We have all had one; maybe it's that girl who is oh so lovely to your face, but everyone is constantly telling you about the nasty things she said about you when you weren't there or maybe it is that friend who can't give you a compliment unless it's backhanded. Frenemies come in all shapes and sizes, they all have their different little habits of somehow bringing you down and making you question aspects of your life you were happy about before their 'advice'. The one thing they all have in common is that although they 100% deserve to get in the bin, you just can't seem to cut the chord. You always think about ending the friendship but then you remember good memories or they act nice again and you wonder if it was maybe just you who took their comments in the wrong way and the cycle goes back around one more time. Well, frenemies are definitely something you shouldn't have and I am here to remind you of why you have to get rid of them and end the friendship. 

If for no other reason you have to cut chords with your frenemy because they hold you back in life. You tell them your new idea to start a Youtube and they tell you how hard it is to grow on that platform, they pretend it is just a piece of advice but underneath they don't want you to do it in case you succeed. Frenemies have a way of putting hurdles in front of anything that might mean that you will succeed and be happier in life and more often than not we allow these hurdles to prevent us from doing what we want to do because the advice was from someone we see as a friend. If you just get rid of that frenemy then you can put yourself out there, take opportunities and be supported by people who are both happy for you and willing to give advice that doesn't make you press stop on your plans. 

We all hate gloaters, those that have to get their "I told you so" in even if you're sat in tears because your heart is broken or your life plan fell out of place. That I told you so makes no one feel better but the gloater. Real friends don't tell you how they were right that that guy would cheat on you or that you wouldn't get the job your heart was set on, even if they actually had told you beforehand. Frenemies love to kick you when you're down instead of offering a helping hand to get back up and brush yourself down. No one needs that negativity in their life, those people are constantly looking for a reason to see you hurt or unsuccessful and that's just completely wrong and not the characteristics of someone you want in your court. 

A friendship cannot exist if there is no trust and frenemies are not to be trusted. Whether they tell your secrets, try to start arguments between you and others or they try to undermine you trusting a frenemy is always a bad idea. I once told someone I thought was my friend about my worries over another friend's toxic relationship and she told her and started a huge argument that led to me cutting ties with all parties, it was not pretty. Frenemies like to make themselves the martyr so are willing to share all your secrets and gossipy comments if it means they look like the good guy and you look like the bad guy, they almost always add more to the story too to emphasise just how terrible a person you are. 

Most frenemies have the ability to cause drama where ever they go, they make enemies where ever they go to. More often than not they are your frenemy for a reason and normally that reason isn't just one you've thought of, most other people see them as their frenemy too. So when you cut ties with this person chances are you will have a much less dramatic life than the one you lead with them in it. You won't have to argue with them, you won't be undermined by people you thought you could trust and you won't have to deal with the drama that comes from them constantly making enemies. 

Frenemies have the ability to bringing out competitiveness in us that we otherwise don't have. They compare themselves to us, they judge their successes based on ours and we start to do the same thing. We start to think "I NEED to get a good job before Janet does" or "I need to gain 5k on Instagram before Delilah". They make us doubt that our successes are worthy because they always have bigger and better news and we start to look at them as our competition instead of our friend which isn't how we should be with friends. If we just sever ties with them we can happier with who we are despite if we are doing better than them or not. 

What reasons have I missed? Do you think you have a frenemy you need to cut off or have you already done it? Tell us your advice below. 

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