Accepting My Own Pace

Accepting My Own Pace

Sometimes I look at my blog and I think "Wow, I am so incredibly proud of my little corner of the internet" other times I look at it and I think to myself "Why do I try? I am never going to be good enough." These tend to be the two extremes that my self-esteem jogs back and forth from, there is hardly ever a middle ground where I am proud despite my shortcomings, that is until now. The thing is, there are so many bloggers out there right now it becomes so incredibly difficult not to compare yourself to them, comparisons are natural, they are a part of human nature, so how can I possibly ever be happy if there is always someone better than me?

I have recently learned the concept of 'my time' and how my time is different from everyone else's time because I am a completely individual person with different things going on, different aspirations and different interests. No two bloggers are ever the same so how can we expect them to grow and conquer at the exact same rate? We can't, it's pretty much human knowledge that we are not going to go through our lives at the exact same pace as our peers so why do we put so much pressure on ourselves to succeed at the same rate as them? It's not like we see someone getting fired or failing at something and assume we should get fired or fail too just because "Oh she started her job at the same time as me." I have begun to realise that comparing my success to others is my mind's way of taking a jab at my self-esteem, because really, that is all it does, lower my self-esteem.

Accepting My Own Pace

The thing is I can't expect to do as well in the views department or have as many followers as someone who blogs as a full-time job. Afterall, it is their job, they work on it all day every day whereas I have university to think about, attending uni 4 times a week and working on all of my assessments during most of my free time. How can I possibly compare my blog to theirs? I mean you wouldn't ask someone who plays tennis once a week to compete against Andy Murray, that's not how the world work, but somehow my brain has a way of making me feel inadequate despite this piece of knowledge. I have been blogging for a while now and I may not be exactly where I hoped I would be, but I am through with comparing myself to other people because all it does is make me upset and unmotivated. Instead, I want to be motivated by these other bloggers, I want their hard work and motivation to make me want to work harder. 

My blog is something that I have worked on every week for almost two and a half years now and maybe one day I'll double in popularity and have as many followers as I hope to and be as big as my favourite bloggers, but for now, I am happy. I am happy to be a small but hardworking blogger who is taking it all one step at a time and happy to move along at my own pace. Rome wasn't built in a day and neither was my blog and I am perfectly happy with that.

Do you compare your blog a lot? How do you feel about comparisons? Do you think they help or hinder your process?

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