Losing Myself in The Numbers

Losing Myself in The Numbers

I am baaack! So if you don't follow me on Twitter, you probably have no idea what I am talking about, but last week I decided it was time to take a little break from blogging. I have quite a few reasons for doing so, but this week I am back on track and back to blogging three times a week; Monday, Wednesday and Friday. 

Well there are a few reasons I opted to take a small blogging break. Firstly, I was quite upset with my blog, unhappy in how slow it was growing, I didn't think any of my content was good or that I was posting what I wanted to post. I felt like I wasn't planning enough or taking enough time to write meaningful posts I would be proud of. I decided that a little break from blogging would cleanse my mind, stop me from worrying and give me time to plan out what exactly I want my blog to be and where I want it to go. 

At the beginning of my blogger break, I spent a lot of time away from my laptop, I wasn't reading as many blogs for the first few days, I wasn't checking my stats or promoting, I really wanted to separate myself from my blog for a week, but it didn't quite go that way. 

I love blogging, I love reading blogs and love to keep up-to-date with my favourite blogs. So about a day and a half into my blogging break and I went onto Bloglovin and looked for my favourite blogs, I looked for blog posts about 'favourite bloggers' and 'blogs to follow' and I looked for inspiration. I found a lot of inspiration and I stumbled upon some blogs I once loved and cloned myself after that are the complete opposite of where my blog is now. 

Although I am against copying and I would never replicate someone's post or blog on purpose I found myself wondering if I truly had lost my way with blogging. When I began, I had a big idea, I knew what the big image of my blog was and where I wanted to be years down the line, now I am no way close to that position. Of course I have grown and with time my blog has grown with me, but I think I have been too caught up in you, the reader. I am overwhelmed by the readership and support I have with my blog, I mean I am not big, I have a minuscule following compared to most, but I am overwhelmed by it every time I gain another follower or reader, but I lost what I want from my blog focusing on what is popular among readers, not just my readers, but what is popular among all bloggers. I have lost myself in a popularity contest. 

Well I hope to be making some changes to heythererobyn.com, they may be drastic or they may be small, but I will be making quite a few. I still want to write about beauty, lifestyle, blog tips and tricks and so on, but I want to maybe add some fashion and I want to write for myself, not for some more followers. 

I focused a lot of my posts on what I thought would be popular or what I thought would get me some followers and readers, but that's not why I blog, I blog because I love blogging, I love to write and share things with people, I love to help others whether that be through fashion and beauty or through education, career or intellectual topics. 

I hope that by writing for me I will fall back in love with blogging, with my blog and I will enjoy it again. I won't be worrying about not getting as many views as the day before or a post not getting as many comments as the one before. I will focus more on what feels right and less on what gets views. This doesn't mean I will abandon those who do read my blog and comment, I still want to make my blog a place people enjoy coming to read.

Well I want to add some fashion posts, I want to have passion about what I am talking about and enjoy what I am doing with my blog. I want to plan my blog posts better, have everything ready to go weeks in advance and have a much more flowing blog schedule. 

I want to look at my blog and be proud and not compare it to other blogs, instead I will be turning my envy into motivation (read my post on how I do this here). I don't want to focus on being popular and I just want to enjoy blogging the way I did before I began to gain followers and let myself get caught up in numbers. 

I wanted to add this section to this post because I have fallen back in love with reading blogs because I am no longer comparing my blog to theirs and I want to share some of the blogging love showing you the blogs which continue to inspire me. 

Have you ever gotten caught up in numbers? Do you think it is more important to have followers or that we enjoy blogging?

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